Ok bro, you’re wrong and laptops haven’t come with removable batteries since before OP was born (probably).

Of course, I also took the lead acid batteries out of my ancient laptops before I e-wasted them and went down to the sock-hop and dinosaur ride.

Not sure, the battery doesn’t really get cycled, it doesn’t get hot, I have a few which are going strong after 10+ years (the useful life of the hardware).

It’s not a hypothetical for me.

I usually pick up the cheapest non-chromebook laptop I can find and put Linux on it.

There are a couple key advantages here:

1. It’s very cheap.
2. Battery Backup included.
3. Monitor and keyboard included.
4. Power efficient by design.
5. Available all the time from any vendor.
6. You can take it with you, update your server on the couch and slap it back on the rack.
7. Virtually any configuration you want in candy colors.
8. Did I mention these are very cheap?

It can be a bit tricky to find one with Ethernet and two SSDs is kinda exotic (especially because you could get two whole laptops for the cost of some NAS enclosures) but there are over 3000 different models under $300 on Amazon, I’m sure you can find something good.