Focus on services before devices. iCloud to Nextcloud, iPhoto to Immich, HomeKit to Home Assistant, etc. You can start using them concurrently, alongside Apple services so you still have that safety net while you figure things out. Most self-hosted services will have iOS/MacOS/TVOS clients so you can start using them now. Then when you’re ready to swap a device, you’re mostly ready to go.

I’ve been working on this myself after being all in on the Apple ecosystem since 2006. So far, I’ve moved to Jellyfin for my media, and made the Nexcloud and Immich switches. The most important thing here is that as you start to self host more important things like photos and documents, have a good way to back up that data.

So I’ve been working through this myself recently. I was pretty deep into the ecosystem and frankly there’s not a replacement for everything, but most of it’s close enough for me. Much of this will depend on what you’re really wanting to accomplish.

For Mac you didn’t mention whether it’s an Apple Silicon or Intel device, so this is going to all be specific to my experience which is with Asahi Fedora Remix on an M1 MacBook:
I use the GNOME version since I think the UX has some Apple familiarity and works well for laptops but Plasma is probably a better choice for a desktop.
It’s generally very stable but it doesn’t really have anything yet to easily translate x64 apps to ARM - there’s muvm, but if what you’re trying to run isn’t covered by the included libraries (e.g. Electron apps) you’re going to have to build an overlay filesystem image containing the dependencies you need; it doesn’t “just work” like Rosetta (or in the Windows world, Prism).
You will also lose some of the stuff like Touch ID because reverse engineering the SEP and sepOS are still in progress. Battery life also isn’t as good.
Lastly, Linux desktop security simply isn’t comparable to any modern build of macOS. TCC on macOS provides incredibly robust protections for user data and device access that Windows and Linux simply don’t offer (yet). On the bright side with Asahi, you do still get some decent protection against low-level compromise because each OS (“container”) on Apple Silicon has its own verified boot chain and recoveryOS, which is largely immutable, can in theory be used to nuke an infected install.

I replaced my iPhone with a Graphene Pixel, but I mostly just use it for web browsing and email and I was an Android user for a long time prior so I can’t speak to whether this would be an easy transition or not.

My replacements for Apple services so far are:

• iCloud Drive: Nextcloud with a Managed Service Provider with Cryptomator to approximate the end-to-end encryption offered by the Advanced Data Protection option.
• iCloud Private Relay: Mullvad, though any trustworthy VPN should do. Note that it’s not an exact replacement because iCloud Private Relay traffic originates from Apple IP ranges which tend to have a much better reputation than VPNs and thus run into anti-bot measures less frequently.
• iCloud Mail, Calendar, Contacts: Tuta mail + Addy.io for the “Hide my Email” aliasing component.
• iCloud Keychain: Proton Pass, though whether you’d want to trust Proton at this point is another topic of discussion that’s out of scope here.
• iCloud Photos: I’ve recently tried out Zeitkapsl and have been extremely pleased with it. Their desktop app originally didn’t have an ARM Linux build so I reached out to see if one might eventually happen and within a day or two their team had one ready.
• iCloud Notes: This one is tough to replicate. It’s so simple, yet it’s probably one of the most valuable products for me in the ENTIRE Apple ecosystem and one of the few utilities I actually found value in having synced between all my devices. I’ve been using Obsidian with the .md files synced in a Cryptomator vault to replace it, though I may end up subscribing to their sync service just for ease-of-use.

There are other viable options for most or all of these; I had a pretty specific set of requirements in mind when making my choices: no documented data collection or sharing beyond what’s absolutely strictly necessary, no Google analytics or push notifications, European owned and hosted, end-to-end encrypted where possible, no advertising, no profiling, etc.

If you have any questions let me know, hope this helps though!

Install an app that monitors their usage (with consent of course). Run for a week or month. Justify with their own data. “You only actually do these 4 things. Let’s look at each of these good replacements for them” One at a time, gated. If 1 works, we move to 2, etc. When all done conversation is you like these 4 now, they all run on Linux, let’s backup all your files and switch to Linux. You’ll have all your programs, and the files you need. And we’ll start with a skin closest to macOS look and feel.

I can recommend Garmin watches. They work with both Android and iOS which could help with the transition. They have a variety of models from casual/stylish to very fitness focused. They tend to be more expensive, but they also have not (yet) enshittified, which is worth something to me.

I have partially transitioned from macOS to Linux, in my experience the main thing is to migrate services such as email and passwords. Once you’re using something open source for those on your I devices you’re way less locked in. iCloud wise I’d recommend getting a managed nextcloud instance. It has a lot of the features you need and provides platform agnostic sync. Also, you don’t need to manage your own it security which is a plus is you’re not super technical.

Ive been deeply entrenched in the apple ecosystem, and I did eventually switch. key for me, similar to what other people said, was to switch the programs/ apps first. by moving to Firefox (zen), thunderbird, Libre office, Obsidian/zettlr, immich and the likes on apple first, I was able to swap out the OS without the need to relearn much.

so, my recommendation would be to get her the replacements, step by step, and give her time to get to know them, whilst having the previous defaults as fallback.

Edit

Where to start: She’s only indicated interest in Linux, so start there and do the minimum changes needed to make it work. Create a partition on her mac, install a linux distro, and try set it up to replace her mac. The things that you can’t get working are the things she needs to replace with a cross-platform alternative.

While she switches these services (step wise, as discussed below), she can play with the stuff that does work on linux, maybe test different distros if she wants.

Once you’ve got a functioning linux set up that she uses as her daily driver, then you can discuss whether she wants to switch anything else.

End edit

I’m in the process of switching off the apple ecosystem and my main learning so far has been to go slower than you think, change is hard and time consuming. I recommend the following.

1) Switch one thing at a time

I made the mistake of buying new devices before I had switched any service providers. This meant I had to switch and test a new os and multiple new services simultaneously, which was extremely stressful. Switching one thing at a time means the process takes longer but is more likely to keep her motivated and engaged.

2) Plan what to change and the order of the steps

It will help her motivation if she has a goal and knows why she is changing something, particularly if she can find a reason other than just platform compatibility. Think about things like cost, privacy or ethical considerations, practicality of services you two (would like to) share e.g. calendars, shared albums.

Timing also matters. First priority is those services which have compatibility issues with android and/or linux, for which you will need to find a cross-platform alternative. Other services she might only choose to change after switching her OS, to options that aren’t available in the apple ecosystem.

Start with the services she uses a lot or which have strong emotional value. If you can’t switch those, the experiment is over.

3) Osxphotos for faces

Apple photos does not have the option to export a lot of metadata. Particularly relevant for me was that no information on faces is exported, which is something I spent a lot of time on. I switched my photos to Ente, using their recommended approach directly on my iPhone, and none of that metadata transfered.

I recently discovered Osxphotos (on github), which lets you export all the metadata on a mac. That’s actually next on my to do list - export my photos on my mac and reimport them to Ente.

4) Setup the new os in parallel

Install Linux on a partition on her mac, so that she can switch between MacOS and Linux. That gives you time to work out any issues. If she likes it, she will naturally start using Linux more, until eventually it becomes her daily driver.

5) New hardware comes last

Hardware is expensive and it sucks to spend money and then feel like you have to use something which you don’t really like. So use linux on her mac and consider buying a 2nd hand phone to test and play with before switching her sim.

6) Be careful of dependence

Be careful of self-hosting too much for her. Think about what happens if you’re not around for any reason (accidents happen) and ensure she has a good plan and knows how to access and transfer her data from self-hosted to alternative options. That’s why I prefer Ente to Immich.

Also, if your self-hosted services go down at a critical time for her, that could be bad for your relationship.

I’d start with a cell phone first. The last thing you want to do is give up your life to google and microsoft. Get yourself a graphemeOS compatible phone and replace all the apps with open source solutions. There is a (very very brand new) app called Vela Maps that acts just like google maps, only you can choose not to talk to google servers when you do.

Use sync-thing to auto upload photos to a server you control, even her home PC

There are ways to change the linux desktop to look like apple, though I don’t know what they are. possibly KDE?

unfortunately only google pixel tablets work with grapheme OS. There are tablets that are compatible with ubuntu touch

As for the watches, I don’t know of any that are de-googled.

Acronyms, initialisms, abbreviations, contractions, and other phrases which expand to something larger, that I’ve seen in this thread:

8 acronyms in this thread; the most compressed thread commented on today has 10 acronyms.

[Thread #154 for this comm, first seen 2nd Nov 2026, 19:10] [FAQ] [Full list] [Contact] [Source code]

I’m the one who migrated off macOS, but I’m still heavily on iOS. All of my family is with iPhones, and we have a bunch of iPads. I’m having MacBooks, and they all run Linux (they’re old Intel models, and work perfectly well on Linux). Our home computer is on Fedora too.

As for the migration, I’d suggest making an attempt at migration with some old laptop: ThinkPad or even older Intel MacBook, the Retina 2012…2015 line up works really well for me. That way she’d have an opportunity to slowly learn and compare.

Apple’s ecosystem wasn’t bad when I migrated, and I was somewhat scared to switch fully. I did that only when I realised I haven’t touched my macOS MacBook for years! (We’ve been watching TV series off it, to keep the battery functioning more or so.)

Also, what helped is me realising I don’t need that tight integration between the phone / tablet and laptop / desktop. They’re different devices: to consume content vs to create it. So, it helped. But, I’m still learning the new apps. Particularly the design ones are awful on Linux. Figma is mostly the same, but Inkscape is just miserable, but I’m trying to keep using it, even despite the interface being terrible. Gimp turned out to be okay, more or so. Krita was mostly good too, so I don’t miss Photoshop. But I do miss video editing software. I hope Blender might help some things I miss, but I’m yet to learn it.

Interface wise, I think Gnome is perfectly fine for a macOS refugee (just search for the solution to keep cmd + v behaviour, there’s the project for that, I forgot the name: Toshy something; I use my own shortcuts now). However, you can make KDE behave very similar to macOS, to ease the transition.

The primary pain point is the apps. They’re different, and usually worse. Sometimes they’re better, if you strive for simplicity. So, it’s a mixed bag. Myself, I don’t see myself going back. I may use a MacBook with macOS, but my primary system at home would be Linux. As I have too many tiny little things now that are Linux exclusive.

One pitfall I see people fall into is expecting to find the same level of polish and convenience that Big Tech has in Open Source alternatives.

Trying to find a Macbook, iPhone, or macOS, but it’s Linux is going to be a fool’s errand. They’re different worlds and you shouldn’t expect one to work like the other. Some things have no equivalents and you will have to give them up. Don’t give into the loss aversion. These were traps from the very beginning. You’re just noticing them now. Focus on the newly gained freedom. You’ll have to learn to like freedom more than convenience traps and shiny UIs.

Having said that, Linux has definitely made huge strides in being more user friendly, but realistically, it’s not as seamless as those billion-dollar corporations.

Apple Watch does not really pair with Android devices, so be aware of that. Changing your phone also drops you out of that.

If she’s developing apps for iOS, there’s no other alternative to XCode for Linux.

Try to avoid anything that accepts creeptocurrency as donations. Almost without fail these projects go down the shitter. E.g., Proton.

🚫 Crypto Cult Science
“Money corrupts; bitcoin corrupts absolutely. Disregarding all of bitcoin’s shortcomings, a financial instrument that brings out the worst in people—greed—won’t change the world for the better.” —https://www.arscyni.cc/file/crypto_cult_science.html

Tether is a useful tool for keeping an iPhone, but switching off MacOS. The main features I use it for are:

• Clipboard access between devices
• Notifications/replies to Messages
  -General notifications

Works over a combo of bluetooth and wifi. It’s not as neat as the MacOS / iOS version, obviously, I was a heavy user of the clipboard sync between phone and laptop and this works well enough to replace it. localsend can do some of the same, but I haven’t found it all that reliable.

https://github.com/zackb/tether

I used to use an iPhone, and moving to an Android device was relatively smooth bar WhatsApp, which was incredibly annoying to deal with. It is possible to transfer message history though, and my family (now on Android) are very happy to get much better battery life!

If you need specific recommendations, I would go for the Fairphone if possible, else Sony Xperia and OnePlus devices are pretty neat too (former if you like headphone jack and notchless display, latter if you want top spec mobile gaming). You also have mobile Linux being a real option nowadays with the Jolla Phone (SailfishOS) and Nura devices (OnePlus 6/6T, Pocophone F1, Fairphones, etc.)

As for smartwatches, you have WearOS watches of course, but jumping into another ecosystem isn’t great. Pebble is really fun, and if you are into fitness Garmin has lots of options, and both work for iOS and Android (nice!), meaning it is an easier transition.

For Android tablets, OnePlus ones are pretty good though, and GrapheneOS can run on the Pixel Tablet. You of course have the various x86 tablets that can run Linux, as well as many ARM devices that support Nura (formerly postmarketOS), the latter usually being some sort of Chromebook (please don’t use ChromeOS)

And of course, the laptop. If it’s an M1/2/3 Mac, Asahi Linux could be an option, then you don’t need to buy any hardware! Old Thinkpads are awesome on budget, and you have a variety of Linux oriented laptops (System76, Tuxedo, etc.), and most Windows laptops will run Linux just fine as long as you’re not running an old kernel (e.g. Debian) on very new hardware.

As for desktops, you have endless amounts of Windows mini PCs and old workstations to choose from, buy used because memory prices are insane. Go for the ones available on the nearest used marketplace for cheap! It’s amazing how compatible Linux is with older devices, even more so than Windows.

If you need good alternatives to proprietary software, you have LibreOffice, Pinta (or GIMP if you are fancy), Inkscape, Kdenlive, Audacity/Tenacity, an endless number of code editors, etc. If you want to game, Linux is a lot better than Mac in this respect nowadays with Proton and such, Steam, Lutris (all-in-one, super customisable), Heroic (for GOG), and Minigalaxy (also for GOG) are awesome